Now all of Celesteville was in a total panic! The hunter who they thought had perished years ago was alive and was out to revoke their protection rights so that he could hunt them all again! And the biggest non-conservatve hate group on earth and the second biggest (and most misognist) were on his side!
Naturally, all the citizens were swarming the palace asking Babar about what they were going to do. He had no idea so he eventually had the barricade the palace doors tight.
“Oh Celeste...” Babar said miserably. “I’m...I just have no idea what to do!”
“There there BAbar.” Celeste said kindly. “You’ve just been under so much stress.”
“I’m the king.” Babar said. “Everyone turns to ME for guidance...”
“We turned to you for guidance before you were king.” Celeste pointed out. “Do you remember when we were children and the hunter was after us? We probably all would have been dead if you hadn’t taught us all the information about humans! Everyone looks up to you because you’re so smart and resourceful.”
“Celeste,your words are very kind to me.” Babar said. “But I’m afraid I just don’t know what to do if we lose the court case....”
“I know Babar!” Zephir said.
“You do?” Babar asked surprised. “What’s that?”
“Remember when Rataxes was on those drugs which made him a power hungry dictator out to enslave all the elepants? We scared him off with a fake giant mammoth monster!”
“I’m afraid that prop was destroyed in a fire a few years ago.” Celeste said sadly.
“And besides.” said Babar. “The hunter won’t fall for something that fake looking. Rataxes is just an idiot, whether he’s a tyrant or a dork. And neither will the WBC.”
“Or DAvid J. Stewart!” Flora shouted entering along with the other kids and Babar’s parents.
“Hi Babar, just took the kids for a walk.” Adeline said.
“Dad, I’ve been looking at this David STewart guy online, and he’s a big male chauvinist!” Flora cried.
“OH FLora, some men are just...”
“Read some of these articles he says against feminism.” Flora said.
Babar scanned through a few..
“Oh my goodness....” Babar said. “He’s...he’s a total misognist!”
“But he seems so persuasive!” Flora cried. “Daddy, is this who’s going to write teh hunters speech for court?”
“Flora, this issue reminds me of a story when I was just a boy.” Babar said. “It all started when...”
Babar, we don’t have time for one of your flashback stories!” Celeste cried. “We are in a serious dilema here!”
“The only thing I suppose we can do is testify in court and share our side of it.” Babar shrugged.
“When are we leaving dad?” Pom asked.
“You children are staying here.” Babar said. “This is for your mother and I too....”
“Babar, I don’t want the kids staying here without us.” Celeste said. “With all these picketers and the hunter still alive...they could be in danger.”
“Dear, they’ll have Pompadour and Cornelius to look after them.”
“Actually honey, Pompadour is coming too.” Celeste said. “He’s been receiving a considerable amount of hate from the protesters lately and wants to get away. Listen.”
“Go to hell you mammoth fag!” the picketers were shouting.
An annoyed Pompadour gathered stormed off while Cornelius gave him a sad look.
“Well what about Cornelius?” Babar asked.
“They seem to think he’s goth.” Celeste replied. “And they hate goths too.”
“Very well.” said Babar. “I suppose it might be for the better for the children to come. They can see their father finally put that menace in its place once and for all!”
“I wanna kick his butt!” Alexander cried.
“I wanna circumsize him!” ISabelle cried (who was the youngest at age five).
“Isabelle!” Celeste gasped. “Where on earth did you hear that?!”
“From the people outside.” Isabelle said.
Zephir suddenly entered.
“Babar, you’ve got to do something about those protesters.” Zephir said. “They’re driving everybody nuts!”
“They unfortunately will not see reason and leave.” said Babar. “They have a right to be here so we cannot legally make them...”
“Maybe Rataxes can help us get rid of them.” Cornelius suggested.
“Oh no!” Babar cried. “I’m still sore with him after what he did to my parents! Besides, he knows nothing about attacking..unless he takes the pills again.”
“Well we certainly don’t want that again.” Adeline said.
“No mother, we certainly do not.” replied Babar.
“Son, I’m coming too.” said Adeline. “It’s time I started making up for my mother duties I missed when you were a child.”
“Mother, I think you and dad would be safer...”
With these picketers?!” Adeline cried.
BAbar sighed. “No...I suppose not....alright, so it’s Celeste, the children, Pompadour, Cornelius, you, father and I who’s going. No one else.”
“Babar let me come too!” Zephir cried running in.
“Zephir, I’m sorry but I can only take so many people to the trial and...”
“They think I’m mentally disabled!” Zephir cried. “They said I’m just like those mentally challenged monsters who.....”
“Alright! Fine! You can come too Zephir! But NOBODY ELSE!”
Troubadour, Babar’s mute diminiative assistant raised his hand.
“No Troubadour, you can’tcome.” Babar said teresely.
Troubadour’s head sunk low in disappointment.
“Hey dad look!” Pom cried looking out the window. “The picketers are leaving!”
“Oh thank God!” screamed Babar. And indeed they were. They were all packing up their signs and followung Fred PHelps.
“Thank you so much for leaving!” Celeste cried.
“We’re not leaving to make you happy.” said Fred Phelps. “We’re leaving to picket those civilized rhinos before the trial!”
Everyone looked very worried...but Babar was the least worried among them.
“Daddy, are they gonna hurt the rhinos?” Isabelle asked sadly.
“Unfortuantely, I’m sure they won’t dear.” said Babar.
“Babar!” ADeline scolded.
“No dear, they won’t make their move yet.” said Babar. “But the hunter and them both will in court unless we present a great case.”
“How do we do that?” Celeste asked.
“Simple my dear: we get a lawyer.” said Babar. “And I know just who: Ellen Elephant.”
“I thought that she just defended welfare malpractice here in Celesteville.” Celeste said.
“She does, but I’m sure she’ll take our case pro bono since our kingdom is jeopardy.”
“You could just force her to take it as king dad.” Pom said.
“Oh son, that wouldn’t be just now would it?” Babar asked.
“Besides, I’m sure she would be happy ot accept the case.” Celeste added. “Considering that our whole city is in jeopardy.”
So Babar went to go and see her at once.
“I would be more than happy to take your case your majesty.” said Ellen. For a price.”
“A price?!” Babar gasped. “Ms. Elephant, the whole city of Celesteville is in major jeopardy, and you may be our only hope of stopping the hunter from getting our protection rights revoked! And you’re saying you want MONEY!”
“I do not work pro bono sir.” she replied.
“How much do you want?” Babar asked.
“I’m not expensive though. I’ll take the case for a hundred bucks.”
“Sold!” Babar cried and they shook trunks.
While Babar was packing to leave for Paris and fight the hunter and Westboro Baptist Church, there was a knock on the door.
“Is that you Celeste?” BAbr called.
“No Babar, it’s madame.” Madame called out.
“Oh, come in.” Babar said.
“Packing for the trip?” she asked.
“Yes. I believe I have everything. Just gotta make sure Troopoadour knows what to say when the people have questions while I’m gone.
“But Troopadour can’t speak.” said madame.
“I know. That’s why I put him in charge.” Babar replied. “They’ll eventually get bored of not getting any response from him and leave.”
“Oh babar!” Madame laughed.
The next morning, everybody was packedand ready to leave for Paris.
“We just need to go fetch Ella and we’re all set.” said Babar.
But Ella did not show up. Babar called her.
“Ella? Are you ready?” Babar asked.
“Nope! The hunter said he’d let me live if I didn’t help you! You’re on your own sir!”
BAbar was speechless. “Now what will we do?!”
“Um...there is one other person who could help us....” Cornelius said.
“REally? Who?” Babar asked.
“Basil.....” he said.
“Basil?!” Babar cried. Basil was the rhino King Rataxes diminuitive right hand man. He was good natured, but didn’t have the sharpest tusks in the jungle.
“When Rataxes went insane, Basil left and took a study in the rhinoland law school. Perhaps he can help us in court.”
“I guess we have no other options.” Babar shrugged. “Off to Rhino Land.”
When they arrived there, they found the WBC yelling and shouting outside of Rataxes palace!
“That’s great. How will we get in?” Alexander asked.
“Through the backdoor!” Flora cried. “Victor showed it to me!”
Victor was King RAtaxes son. So they went in and found Rataxes annoyed in his bedroom.
“Oh Basil, make those picketers stop! My wife needs her beauty sleep!” he cried. “And you know how cranky she gets without it!”
“I’ll try my best your rhiness.” Basil said and went out to the balcony.
“Hey everybody!” he called. “Um...the king’s wife Lady RAtaxes needs her rest...and she can be real cranky without it and...can cause real rampages.. so...could you...maybe picket somewhere else?”
The WEstboro picketers all looked at one another. Then Fred Phelp’s wife Margie stepped in.
“Every disaster is a sign from God you little demon!” she called. “If she rampages, it’s because God is angry with the fags and you animals for going against the way he made the earth!”
And they continued shouting and picketing.
“Rataxes?” Babar asked.
Rataxes spun around and gasped.
“Babar?! What are you doing here?!”
“We need a favor.” he replied. “You’ve no doubt heard the dreadful news right?”
“That these picketers are annoying my wife? Yes indeed.”
“No no no. About the hunter.”
“The hunter?” Rataxes asked. “What about him?”
“He’s alive.” Babar said. “And he’s out to sue to get the Celesteville Protection Act revoked. We’re going to court to stop him and the Westboro Baptist Church from revoking our rights, but our lawyer bailed out on us. We were wondering...could we borrow Basil for the case?”
“Basil?” Rataxes asked. “Why would you want him for? He’s a nice fellow yes, but...”
“And I am a lawyer too.” Basil said. “Went to law school.”
“WhaT?!” RAtaxes gasped. “And when did you do this?”
“When you became a power hugnry dictator from those new meds, I went to law school and got my education. And I’d be happy to help them sir.”
“Why should I let Basil help you?” RAtaxes asked. “It’s your rights they’re after, not ours.”
“Rataxes, you don’t have any protection rights.” Celeste pointed out.
“What?! That’s ridiculous! Of course we do! Right Basil?”
“Um...no sir we don’t.” Basil said sheepishly.
“WHAT?!” RAtaxes screamed.
“My city obtained the rights because the humans in France know and love me.” Babar said. “They don’t know you RAtaxes because you never came to PAris..so RhinoLand is public domain for any hunter. But they don’t know this yet and if you help me, I’ll convince them to set up a Protection ACt for Rhinoland as well.”
“I..well...no!” RAtaxes said. “We’ll just stampede and scare those hunters and protesters off!”
“Rataxes, remember what happened the last time someone tried that?” Babar said refering to when the then non civilized elephants decided to stampede and trample the hunters, only to be captured very quickly.
“And the time when YOU got captured trying to ram into the hunter’s truck when he returned to catch us all?” Celeste asked.
“We all may be civilized now, but the hunter is very evil and very powerful.” BAbar said. “We need to use our wits to outsmart him. Now please let me have Basil come and help us.”
“Very well.” Rataxes said. “But I’d like to come too. And so would my wife and Victor.”
“What on earth for?” Babar asked.
“To get them away from these picketers!” he cried. “They’re driving us all nuts!”
“Very well.” said BAbar. “Now come with us.”
“What? We’re leaving right now?” Rataxes asked.
“That’s right. The trial is tomorrow.” Babar replied. “And we need to be ready.”
So they all headed to the car...but unfortunately there was no room for all sixteen of them.
“We can fly there.” suggested Cornelius.
“No, the picketers will be waiting for us at the airport.” Babar said. “And I’m getting pretty sick of Fred Phelps and his team of ultra conservatives.”
“you should see waht they do at funerals.” Madame said. “People have actually tried forming blockades to stop them from ruuining the memorial with their hate speech.”
“How about a...tran?” Adeline suggested.
“What’s a tran?” Alexander asked.
“That...thing that pulls all those boxes on wheels..” Roueblard said.
“Oh, a train!” Babar said. “That’s a wonderful idea! They won’t expect us there!”
So they arrived at the human station and all went aboard. They looked around. No sign of the picketers.
Boarding the train, Babar smiled at Celeste.
“I think that we gave those hooligans the slip, don’t you?” Babar asked Celeste smiling.
“I think that you’re right.” Celeste said with a grin. And they were right. No picketers were in sight..but there was another burden: the press.
“There they are!” a reporeter cried. “I told you they would come here instead of the airport!”
They all ran over to him.
“King Babar, what’s your plan to stop him?!”
“Do you have a lawyer?!”
“The king has no comments at this time!” Cornelius shouted. “But yes, we dohave a lawyer. Right here!”
Basil stepped in.
“Hello world! I’m Basil, King Rataxes personal assitant!”
“Who is King RAtaxes?!”
“What law school did you go to that allows animals?!”
“Aren’t you a little short for a rhino?!”
Everyone else went to another trian car.
Adeline stepped in and smiled.
“Babar, I know you’re stressed now.” she said. “But you needn’t be. You’ve got us all with you.”
“Thank you mother.” Babar said. “But I’m afraid I’m not sure that’s going to be enough to defeat the hunter.”
“Babar, you’ve beaten him twice now!” Adeline praised him. “And I slowed him down once. Everything will be okay in the end. I promise you.”
Babar hugged his mother.